Mourning parents

Death cannot take away what you own deep within your heart.

What happens next

Trauer 2

"I know you miss me and mourn me, now that I am not with you anymore, but always remember that I felt and forever will feel loved.”

Contact the funeral director:

  • To collect the body & issue the death certificate

Documents the funeral director needs:

  • Birth certificate
  • Citizenship certificate
  • Marriage certificate
  • Divorce decree
  • University degree certificate
  • Burial plot details (if applicable)
  • Photograph for memorial cards and chapel of rest

Arrangements with the funeral director:

  • Choosing a coffin/urn (option to paint or decorate it)
  • Funeral details (burial, cremation)
  • Ceremony details (humanist funeral with funeral speaker, religious funeral)
  • Clothes for your child
  • Mementos you want to give your child (drawings, personal letter, favourite cuddly toy…)
  • Memorial cards
  • Remembrance picture

Arrangements at the parish office:

  • Choosing the burial plot/columbarium
  • Setting a date for the funeral service/burial/wake
  • Choosing the type of service (humanist or religious funeral)
  • Arrangements for the chapel of rest
  • For a religious funeral: order of service with readings & music

    • Paediatrician
    • Hospital
    • Kindergarten
    • School
    • Paediatric nurse
    • Therapist…

Planning the funeral:

  • Flowers
  • What to wear
  • Order of service
  • Wake
  • Readings, songs, PowerPoint presentation, personal stories and mementos
  • Booking a venue and catering for after the service

After the funeral:

  • Inheritance (you will receive a letter from the notary)
  • Grave maintenance
  • Bank (accounts…)
  • Ministry of Finance (child benefits, carer’s allowance)
  • Health insurance provider (maternity pay)
  • Employer (ending maternity leave)
  • Insurance providers

    • To talk and grieve – talking about it is important!
    • Bereavement support groups/sharing your experience with other mourning parents
    • Psychologist/therapist
    • Support for siblings (children grieve differently)

My name is Beatrix Buchinger, I am married and the mother of three children: Isabel & Julia by my side and Oliver in my heart.

I joined the heart team at Herzkinder Österreich in May 2016 and offer support and guidance for bereaved parents who had to say goodbye to their heart child. Having been in the same situation, I know what it is like and I understand what you are going through. I also carry a child in my heart that no longer walks beside me. I remember the endless hours spent in hospital and the endless hours of worry, uncertainty and fear. Our Oliver was not a heart child, but he still had to leave us too soon.
We feel blessed that Oliver came into our lives and that we were able to be with him and look after him for 14 months. Every day and every moment with him was a cherished gift. I speak from experience when I say that talking to other heart families and bereaved parents, sharing your story with someone who understands and who doesn’t judge you or your situation in any way, can be a great place of much needed comfort and solace.


If you are preparing to say goodbye or have had to say goodbye – I am here for you!

  • To support you as you prepare to say goodbye
  • To help you with practical arrangements at the funeral home
  • To support you in planning the funeral
  • To offer a safe space to talk – What comes next?
  • Join our weekend for mourning parents (once a year)
  • Financial support (funeral, transferring the body…) - please contact us for further informations

Contact person